Life Coaching for Mums - Kirsti's Response

Mum Zone's resident Life Coach Kirsti of Spheres of Success is available to answer some of your questions about a variety of life related issues.Topics include feeling down, work-life balance, getting enough sleep, spending enough time with your kids, the direction of your relationship, pursuing your dream job, learning to put yourself first, establishing your own identity and many more.

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Reader's Question

I am needing to put my son in Childcare, but I think we both suffer from high separation anxiety. And I feel terrible to have to put him into one. He is 20 months, how do I overcome this?

Kirsti's Response

Hello and thanks for your question,

I appreciate leaving your son can be difficult especially if this is the first time. You may need to think about what are all the benefits to your son that daycare can offer. I am assuming that you are going back to work, if this is accurate, consider what benefits this will have to your family eg more money in the budget to spend on family holidays and quality time as a family. If you didn't go back to work, think about how this would affect you personally and financially.

Children are just a reflection of who we are being at any given moment. Its important for you to understand where your separation anxiety comes from and how it's impacting on you personally. It's a beautiful thing you feel so attached and close to your son and you sound like a wonderful caring mum. Your little man is very lucky. I have listed some questions below which may help you. Grab a pen and paper, quiet time and take your time with your responses.

• What makes you feel anxious about leaving your child?
• What do you think about to make you feel this way?
• What images do you create in your mind to feel anxious?
• What opportunities are you missing out on due to you feeling anxious?
• How would you like to feel?
• If you were to drop your son off at daycare, what would be a perfect situation? what would you see, feel and tell yourself?
• If you felt happier, relaxed, confident about your son at daycare, how do you think your son would be?
• Let's just say (for this situation), you were super confident in all decisions you made and you knew you were doing the right thing - would it be easier to deal with your son if he was feeling anxious?
• What would you tell him to make him feel better?
• Thus - what do you need to tell yourself to make yourself feel better?

If you believe your anxiety is affecting your life in some ways, it may be a good idea to consult a medical practitioner or counsellor. If you would also like to talk with me on how to overcome your anxiety, please email at kirsti@spheresofsuccess.com.au

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The opinions expressed on this page are of a general nature and are by no means a substitute for professional advice. Therefore neither Mum Zone or Kirsti Boothroyd of Spheres of Success are liable for any actions pertaining to the use of the supplied information.