Baby Sleep Help - Natalie's Response

Mum Zone's resident Sleep Expert Natalie of Sleep and Settle is available to answer some of your questions about settling your baby and more.

Topics include: Sleeping and settling, moving from bassinette to cot, cot to bed, breastfeeding/formula, solids, floorplay for babies and play for toddlers/children, wrapping/sleeping bags/dressing baby, behaviour/tantrums, what's normal? bedroom environments, music, lights, entertainment, mattresses, mattress protectors, sheets, unsettled babies and the 0-12 week afternoon arsenic hours, reflux/colic, teething, worms, toilet training, night terrors/nightmares, the older child issues 5-10 years and single parenting/separation/divorce.

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Reader's Question

I have a 22 month old daughter. She has never been a great sleeper, but it seems she is waking every night for a bottle of milk. The time she wakes varies every night and it doesn't seem to matter how much she has to eat the night before or what time she goes to bed she still wakes up. I have tried putting her back to sleep without milk, however this can take up to 2 hours. If she has the milk she is back in bed and asleep within 20 minutes. I'd like to know if you can suggest ways in which to stop her from waking and having the milk. Many thanks.

Natalie's Response

I appreciate that after 22 months you would like a full nights sleep and yes you can achieve this.

The simple answer to this question lies in the fact that we the parents create the habits not the children. It is our consistent response to a situation such as night waking that creates or changes a habit. So the solution to the night waking is in your hands and the speed of undoing the habit depends on your consistency in applying a new response overnight.

Consider the following:

• At 22 months your daughter should be eating family foods in the day and drinking only water, not milk or juice. One sipper cup of cows milk with stories before bed is sufficient, then clean her teeth. Her diet contributes to her ability to sleep through the night and in particular the mix of fresh, protein and processed foods for each meal with lighter healthy snacks for morning tea and afternoon tea.
  
  
• Consider how active her play is. Playtime helps her earn her meals and sleep. Remove completely or reduce television viewing to 30 minutes each day preferably in the afternoon if absolutely necessary. Encourage outdoor play as often as possible.
  
  
• Create a sleep inducing bedroom environment with minimum decorations, no night light or music as a sleep association. Whatever is happening at sleep time will need to be repeated overnight each time your daughter wakes.
  
  
• Make sure your toddler is dressed warm enough for all night. I appreciate that this is hard at the moment with the weather being so unpredictable and changing all night.
  
  
• Introduce some consistent cues for day and night sleeps and communicate these with other carer's so that your toddler gets the same messages and feels comfortable and happy to understand this is sleep time.
  
  
• Teach your daughter to self-settle to sleep with no props from you to help her. Choose a sleep strategy that you feel comfortable with and will consistently and persistently apply day and night. You need to have the same strategy day and night so you don't confuse your child. It is important to feel comfortable with your strategy so that you will be confident in its application and your child will respond to it. Your sleep strategy will replace the milk feed overnight. I would also offer 60-100mls of water in a sipper cup for three nights only if your daughter asks for a bottle, but only for three nights and then just settle using your strategy. We offer the water only for three nights in order to provide a drink but discourage the waking because most children won't wake just for water when they were getting milk. Offering the water will not work alone, you will need to have your new strategy to apply in settling your daughter until she returns to sleep. If you would like further detailed information please see www.sleepandsettle.com.au
  
  
• Your daughter doesn't have any concept of time. So when she wakes in the night and you have tried to settle her without a bottle it can take hours if she doesn't believe in or feel your confidence. If she thinks there is any chance of getting a bottle of milk she will cry until she gets it. When you confidently apply your new strategy overnight and there is no option of the milk, only water, she will believe you and respond. It usually takes three days for children to change a habit and believe in your new strategy, remember it is your consistency that changes the rules, not the child. If consistent you should be sleeping 7pm-7am within 3-7 days.
  
  
• If your daughter appears to be asking for and drinking a lot of water overnight and it's not unusually hot consider having a diabetes test for her.

Happy Sleeping,
Natalie

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The opinions expressed on these pages are of a general nature and are by no means a substitute for professional advice. Therefore neither Mum Zone or Natalie Ebrill of Sleep and Settle are liable for any actions pertaining to the use of the supplied information.